I am currently a Junior in AFROTC and will be competing for a pilot slot in February. I am already contracted so i will be in the AF reguardless if I become a pilot or not. My girlfriend is very concerned with married life as pilots wife. She does not want to be left alone all the time. My ideal ariframe would be the F-16 or any fighter. I was hoping to find some info on how married life is as a pilot in the USAF.

Hi There

More than likely you will be gone a lot. You can as well prepare her for that fact right now if you want to persue your dream.

Is your girlfriend concerned about being a military wife, or being a fighter pilot's wife?  If it's the military life she is concerned about, there are several books and forums that are by military wives on what to expect and how to deal with separations.  If it's the life of a fighter pilot's wife she's concerned with, that's something else altogether.

As far as being gone, fighter pilots are not deployed any more than virtually any other airframe or non-flying AFSC.  In fact, in some cases fighter pilots are gone less.  I am a fighter pilot, and I have a wife and kids.  I have not spent nearly as much time gone as I thought I would.  Yes, you will be gone, but that is true no matter what job you end up in the Air Force (with a few exceptions).  The current trend for fighter pilots is approximately 4 months gone for every 1.5 to 2 years home for "combat" (ie, a tour in Iraq), with a few other training deployments interspersed in there.  The forecast is not nearly as gloomy as some would have you think.  Besides, you could be in the Army...

I have some information on the family life of a fighter pilot on my website at www.ChristianFighterPilot.com.  Feel free to email me at cfp@christianfighterpilot.com as well if you have any questions.  I don't check this board terribly often, but I'll try to check to see if you reply.

Being the wife of a fighter pilot for 14 years has been the most wonderful adventure for me. I am the daughter of an AF pilot & then married an F16 pilot! I love it. I love the jet, and I love the life. But it is most definately not for everyone!! I have seen many relationships strained. You have to be prepared. And yes, your wife will be alone a lot in the sense that you will be gone. However, there will be plenty of other pilot's wives whose husbands are also gone. My "pilot wife" friends are some of the greatest, most supportive friends that I have. Even when my husband is gone, I am never "alone". Best of luck to you!!

I read your message regarding being the wife of a fighter pilot and I was hoping you could help me out.  My husband has been a nav on the gunship in the AF for 5 years and has been deployed many times.  He has just been accepted into UPT and the ENJJPT program to be guaranteed fighters. This is his dream job and I am trying to be supportive, but I am honestly very nervous.  I am not sure how much the risk increases from this plane to the one he has been deployed on for years.  I can handle deployment. . . I have grown use to it.  But we want to start a family soon and I don't know if the life of a fighter pilot is suitable for family life.  I guess I just want to know that it can be done.  I am a veterinarian and my job was my dream, so I don't want to stop him from following through with his.  But now a family is my priority and I guess I would just like the opinion of a wife that is doing it. If you have any advice I would really appreciate it.  Thank you.  You can also email me at. j.gamauf@mchsi.com

Fighter guys are gone less than just about any other pilots, and their job is a heck of a lot safer than most.   But then again this is coming from a spec ops pilot so take it for what it is worth.
And the "only real reason" to want to be a military pilot is to be off hacking the mission, so if you do not want to deploy a lot, then do not bother becoming a military pilot, we do not want you if you have that attitude.
Your wife will have to get over it or else it will strain your relationship.  The chances are that she will have trouble at first but then learn how it is different being a military wife and the relationship will be fine.
There are much more dangerous jobs out there than being a pilot so your girlfriend should not worry. And married life is married life, the big difference with military married life is that it will be much easier in the beginning if you both understand that you are in for more trials and tribulations that most people but also more dignity and belief in a good will towards life.
 IT IS IMPERATIVE THAT YOU HAVE A STRONG RELATIONSHIP BASED ON SOME TYPE OF FAITH, and by this I do not mean religious faith.  It could be religion, it could be in family and children, it could be in an adventure to explore then world when you are together, or it could be a faith serving the community and society.  But above all you need to have faith in more that just the typical "we love each other so much, and its just right with us, its different" because the truth is it is not different.  It is a lot of hard work that in my humble opinion is worth every second and more.

Good luck to you in all your decisions and adventures,

P.S.
Don't be a dickhead, nobody likes a dickhead, and there are other better ways to get things done.